Have you ever felt like everything is happening at once? Just as we are getting ready to move, our business is super busy and of course there is so much to do with the move. My life is now one big vitual garage sale on Craigslist. It's a little creepy letting so many people I don't know into my home, but what else is there to do? I don't have a garage....one reason to move!
And I need to have my computer fixed, but I don't have time to do it. Noi pulled 3 keys off my computer, so now in order to type a M, I have to press a little rubber bump that tonight peeled off and I have to hold it in place each time I press it......
Today I was supposed to go see my brother, Kurt, race at the Nascar track in Sonoma and my brand new car is leaking a fluid, so I can't drive it! What a bummer...
Moving...I can't wait! It is so noisy here. Constant bombardment of sirens all day long and now at 1 a.m., the music from the bars and the people is so loud it sounds like they are in my apartment. On top of that, the bar is playing that stupid song about "I don't want to go to Rehab, No No NO." That is the dumbest song...
I guess the most interesting topic in my life now is about balancing life. I seem to struggle with it since Noi was born. I feel like I have a hard time catching up on work, keeping family life in order, watching Noi, and trying to care for myself. And I know Hideto thinks I don't think about him enough, because there is always so much to do. It's really a challenge. Sometimes I feel like there are gaps in time, for example with Hideto, at one point we are all having so much fun and then two hours later there is a disagreement about something and I have no idea what is happening is making him upset. Any comments about balancing life?
Today was a fun day. We walked down to Union Square and there was a band playing and we bought ice cream and sat outside in the sun and enjoyed it. Noi loves ice cream and so do I. There was a mother and son sitting together reading books and Hideto commented that he'd never seen that before. Me neither. It's something I'd like to do with Noi, go outside with a blanket and read books. Looking forward to that day!
Lots of positive things happened today and I am so grateful to have my beautiful life, child, and husband, but right now all I feel like doing is complaining! Joe Mama, from ArtSF, called me after not talking for 2 years and had the nerve to ask me to help with an art show he's organizing. He never helped me with any art shows I organized. He was so selfish and rude. I worked my ass off with ArtSF and he was so against me. Now ArtSF might close, but I don't care, because I worked so hard to bring it to a certain level and he never helped, which is why I quit. It was a fun time and a creative time, but sometimes I wonder if I had put that much effort into making money, I might not have to take out a loan to build a house.....
2 comments:
Balance... the eternal struggle! What helps me is trying to be in the moment when I get overwhelmed by it all. Can I take a break from the stress and hecticness to just take my kid to the park, kiss my husband, make us all a good snack, have a pillow fight to get us all laughing? Sometimes I succeed better than others. Remember you're only human and not alone and be gentle with yourself. Maybe when you hate your neighborhood, get on a bus and go to another area with Noi and read those books on a picnic blanket... don't wait till you're in Japan, because if you wait until ??? you might never do it. Kids area great reminder of living in the moment, because that's all they can really see in the moment. :)
Love the pictures...must save money for trip to Japan. I agree with Supermommy. You just have to take the time, and the blankie, and go read those books. As the mommy of a nine year old, things only get more hectic. Altho I have found more time to write in my journal over the years, but now we have school, soccer, ceramics!the school years are the taxi years, they say. We have made time to read a couple of long books together. I know that I will treasure those moments in the future, even if my house is a sty. Also- we too live in a more "challenging" neighborhood, but that doesn't stop me from finding the best parks in town. Take a few hours - the boxes and Craigs list people will be there when you get back!
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